When Timing Is Everything, Changes Part Four

Day Eight -- NaBloPoMo

Ok, so back to 2017 --

Radiation over, our son married, our daughter engaged, our son-in-law-to-be moved to our town so he and Eler Beth could see each other without having to drive an hour and 15 minutes, and around October Thomas began talking seriously about work and things that were going on there. Corporate was making some strange decisions, supervisors and foremen were shaking their heads. Thomas started getting "work canceled" robot calls for the veriest mist in the air.   

It was like we could see the writing on the wall, but we weren't quite sure if it was plain text or hieroglyphics. Was it going to be a layoff before spring to scare the rank and file so they would negotiate a contract that favored the company (2018 was to have been a contract year)? Would it just be a lean winter with some short-term layoffs or maybe just a lot of canceled days because of weather when it really wasn't necessary? Would the company close and then come back in a year or so non-union (that was one of the rumors going around).  We reminded one another that at the last perfect attendance dinner in the spring there was almost nothing said about how well the company was doing, what contracts were in the offing, or what direction the company was taking, all things that were the norm in previous years.  

Thomas began talking other options and casually looking at other companies in the area.  I went on with my wedding planning and kept an eye on Thomas and his stress level.  In November we looked over the open enrollment packet for 2018 benefits, signed papers, and sent them in.  In December Thomas told me he'd decided he was going to get the surgery on his right knee that he'd needed for a few years.  

He had been putting it off, mainly because he didn't want to be off work for so long. But it really was getting bad. He had had an injury to that leg from basketball before we even got married, but it never really bothered him much, even after working hard, physical jobs all his life, until maybe five years previously. He'd developed a bit of a limp that was noticeable to people other than me. And his leg had begun to bow out at the knee. But no one could talk him into getting surgery until it suddenly occurred to him that he would be walking his daughter down the aisle, AND dancing with her at her wedding. That was the clincher. He said if at all possible he wanted to have the surgery done early enough in the year so that he'd be recovered by the wedding date. He wasn't going to "limp" his daughter down the aisle.  He figured that if he could do the surgery in January or early February, take his short-term disability, which really after taxes would only cover benefits and 401k, he'd be recovered by the April wedding, and if he had a job to go back to, then he'd be in better shape for it. And if there was a layoff or the company closed, then he'd be in better shape for a different job.  

So money-wise we weren't letting ourselves get too worried. We had some savings, we had a good retirement fun that we could borrow from if we had to, we'd have a decent tax refund, and I figured I could always get a part-time job if I needed to. We sat down with the kids and talked about what kind of wedding they wanted and what our parameters were. We had a "here's the cheapest we can do without touching the 401k or using credit cards" and a "here's the most we will spend, using credit cards or the 401k." And let me say here that Thomas is a cash-only kind of guy. He does NOT like credit card bills, and a daughter's wedding or an emergency are two of the only reasons he would willingly use one.  Both Anthony and Eler Beth said that it didn't have to be a BIG wedding. Anthony's parents said, "We want to contribute something."  And Thomas and I said, "Both Anthony's sisters had big weddings. This is a big Italian family. We can't give Anthony and Eler Beth anything less than what his sisters had." And though Thomas didn't say it, I knew that paying for a very nice wedding for his only daughter was important to him and that he wanted it to be 90% our doing if at all possible. Not a lavish wedding, but a nice wedding. And nice weddings with a reception for 2- or 300 guests don't come cheap.  

Eler Beth told me that she'd be fine with a simple reception in an inexpensive venue with family and friends doing the catering, but that she would hate it if Anthony didn't get as nice of a reception as his sisters had. And we agreed. (I don't think any of that family will ever be reading this blog, but even if they do, well, I'm going to write this anyway. His parents have never treated him as well as they have the girls. And that is something I knew long before he and Eler Beth began dating.)  Anyway, it meant a lot to us to see that they had what they wanted within reason, and we were prepared to go into debt to do it.  

And then suddenly one evening in December I remembered something. And I mean, it just sizzled into my brain like a lightening strike! Out of nowhere, out of context, out of the blue, it suddenly occurred to me that the year before we had signed up for an Aflac policy. We had a policy IN EFFECT. A policy that had a CANCER RIDER.  Thomas had already gone to bed and was asleep. I dug out our 2017 employee benefits papers. I found the policy. I read it. I re-read it. I went online and printed out forms. I double checked the deadline to have everything in. I made myself a reminder to make phone calls the next day. And I woke up my husband at midnight and said, "Hey, I just remembered something. We have Aflac!" (And yes, I did it in that voice.)

How could we have forgotten that? I got it filed just under the wire. The payout from the claim was very decent. We set aside a specific amount for seeing us through the winter and for the time Thomas would be recuperating from knee surgery. We set aside an amount for emergencies and rainy days. We gave one another a bit of mad money because, by dogies, we had earned it! And we set aside an amount up to which we were willing to go for our only daughter's wedding, including a nice bridal shower and a nice wedding reception, without being lavish. 

Thomas went to his doctor, got a referral to a surgeon, had his consult, and set a date in January for the surgery. And I went on with the wedding planning.

So anyway, 2017 closed out a bit better than we had thought it might.  And there were still changes coming. 

To be continued... 

~~ Lori  

P.S. The link above is to the series of posts I made about Anthony picking out and buying the engagement ring (with me present and how we had to fool Eler Beth -- and she is HARD to fool), his panic when he thought she preferred a different ring (and HER panic when she realized something was wrong but didn't know what, and Mom to the rescue!) and his surprise proposal with all of us present. The link is to part 3, but that has links to the first two parts as well. So if you'd like to waste another 5 or 10 minutes you can read that story and see some cute pics.